Rec Center Swimming

In the middle of swimming laps this evening, something caught my eye--a mom and son on the other side of the pool. Mom--Covid mask on, no cell phone out, attention fixed on her child. Son--about eleven, slightly chubby, pale, standing next to the pool’s edge smiling incessantly with all fingers and hands in his mouth. He was transfixed.

I stood in the water catching my breath between sets. Mom said Go and the son ran down the steps to face plant in the water, arms splayed out at his sides. My autism alarm went off. Don’t stare I thought...but mom wouldn’t have noticed anyways. To her, it was just she and her son.

The next set was 300 yards, breathing every 3 strokes. I pushed off the wall and felt the fluid friction gliding on my skin. Was this what the son enjoyed as well? I felt the bubbles roll over pursed lips and track across my face, alternating cheeks with each stroke. Was this boy doing the same? Flip turn off the wall, push off, and toes flex to glide in torpedoed ecstasy. Did this boy feel the same weightless joy?

I settled into the set thinking of what a friend (who is a therapist and swimmer) shared about maximizing surface area when pulling through the water. Thumb slightly out, the resistance felt good. I thought of this friend recovering from Covid and his time away from the pool, which is his self-care. I thought about how my mind wandered while swimming and came back to thinking about the boy. Was he still swimming?

Finishing the set, I took my goggles off and saw the boy still in the water, alternating between jumping straight up and down until he was completely under water doing some odd hand motions as if he were trying to catch a handful of water. Mom watched from the deck.

My warm down set was an easy 200 yards. Do I ask her if her son is on the spectrum? No...young mom might be offended, and what if he isn’t? I’d be a jerk (wearing lycra shorts, soaking wet on a pool deck, carrying a water bottle with my name on it).

The warm down went quick. Good workout--so good it’s hard to stop. Over to the hot tub. As I stepped in I saw mom and son exit the pool area through glass doors. I looked around to see if anyone was watching my over-observant gaze. Didn’t want to seem like some creeper! The boy stands alone outside the doors.

Thirty seconds later, mom returns and stares at the door handle, while typing in a code. It’s the family changing room, I walk by it on my way to the pool. Both enter. Aha--this boy is on the spectrum! Level 2 diagnosis (although no accurate diagnosis of anything was ever given from a hot tub). I think back--at no time did mom have her phone out. No other kids were present with mom or son. No parents either...the reality of their situation hits me--a young mother, her son, alone in the water, sheer joy on his face as he is mesmerized by the water.

I wonder, what happens next in their routine? What do they go home to? When does mom get a break? What support is there? Should I have asked?